Have you ever been so scared of change that you literally start to shake when you think about it? I think that’s what was happening to my husband.

We were sitting in the car with the two boys sound asleep in the back when I kept asking him what was going through his head. “I’m fine. I don’t know. We shall see.” Those seemed to be the only words he’d get out! I noticed his hands were a bit shaky and he had a weird face on him and no that’s not just his face.

Me and the three boys were on our way up to London to go spend the weekend with some good friends of ours. I’ve been so excited since the day we arranged it all as the lady has really become one of my really really close friends and comes visits every week. And the man, they are husband and wife, is my husbands good friend from years and years, they grew up together basically. But for the husband the first part of the staycation wasn’t just for fun, it was to go for an interview at a life changing career thanks to his friend.

Since Kai been offered the interview and job he didn’t really speak to me about it so I had no idea what to think. Did he want the job was he more then likely to go for it if it was properly offered to him? Did he worry too much on how it’ll impact all of us? Not a clue.

We were almost to our friends when I asked Kai if he wanted to be offered the job as to which he replied “Yes and no.” “It’s s great opportunity but I don’t think I can go through all that change and do the move there’s just too much to do.” In my head I knew he was turning it down.

Finally we got to Hatfield where our friends live and were greeted with smiley faces. My eldest, Corey, went straight into trying to get everything while Blake, my youngest, cried for a bottle.

We chatted and Kai changed so him and his friend could go to the interview. Kissed him good bye  told him good luck and off he went.

Me the boys and my friend went out and all the while she kept asking how I felt and I was completely honest. “From what I hear of it, it all sounds great and I’d personally take it but I’m not sure he will which is fine cause I’ll stand by him either way.”

Hatfield if gorgeous. It’s quaint and pretty and a lot to do! I started picturing what it would be like to live here. Big mistake. I had to keep reminding my self to not get ahead of myself as i was pretty sure Kai was going to turn it down.

We went to the Galleries which reminded me of an American mall, Sawgrass mills to be exact, with all the outlet stores, (Hello cheap bags of Cadburys!) indoors, loads of restaurants and ‘mall music’ as i like to call it. We grabbed a coffee and then went into the middle where a huge play area was so Corey could play. My friend, bless her, watched Blake as I ran through the tunnels with Corey.

I spotted him right away. Kai and his friend were coming. I don’t know why but a huge knot formed in my stomach when i saw him. I grabbed Corey and went straight to Kai. His face was unlike I’ve ever seen it. I asked how it went. “Good.” I asked what happened. “I’ve been offered the job.” I shrieked inside. But then he went blank. I couldn’t read him he wasn’t making sense, it was as if he went through those whirlwind simulators and lost all sense of direction. Just give me some sort of clue on what your thinking and feeling!

Our friends had to pick up their car, so it gave me and Kai a chance to properly talk. He explained his fears and how he felt in such a Dilemma. I’ve never ever seen him so torn. I finally asked,”Do you want this job.” He looked me in the eyes as he replied “yes.” “Then there’s your answer to it all. We will work everything out when it comes to it Kai we always do. If you don’t take these risks in life you may be risking the greatest opportunities for yourself.” He still looked in a daze.

We got back to our friends house And we all began talking about it. Kai seemed to calm down a bit i noticed all his body and face began to relax. Then,  and finally, he said to his friend, “Thanks mate for this, I’m going to take the job.”

We had a fabulous weekend, which either way if Kai took the job or not I knew we would as I said already they’ve been really great friends. Great food, way too much chocolate, belly laughs, kids playing, visiting new places. It was great. Our friends took us into the middle of St Albans where we became chocatosed (comatose by eating and drinking far too much chocolate) but the cake and hot chocolate was far too good, and went into the Abby which was beautiful. We were all really happy.

We were quite sad to leave. The husband had to go into work on the Sunday, so me and Kai stayed with my friend, watched some telly, chilled had lunch and prepped to leave. We said goodbye and said thank you so much for an amazing weekend.

We got the boys and all of our stuff in the care and waved bye. All the way home we just talked. It was nice that Kai actually started to open up about it all. He was so excited, just worried about what to say to his boss. We spoke about what’s the next plan of action, how he’s going to have to be away in London all week but I’d carry on house hunting. It was all decided, we are moving to London!

-Candi x


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